Dating for larger people dating a shorter guy
I’ve dated classmates, colleagues, friends of friends, total strangers, and poorly matched people from e Harmony.
I start each date with a positive attitude and a hopeful outlook, but the more I date, the more disappointed I become.
These days, I love being the big spoon in the relationship and feeling like I am Paddy's teddy bear. This one tends to come from women who are actually quite strong, feminist role models and personal inspirations of my own.
And I never feel unsafe or unprotected, emotionally or physically, due to our size difference. And so, it's all the more proof that this [quite frankly] nonsensical gender role is one engrained in all of our minds, at least to an extent.
But the idea that in order for a woman to be worth anything she must be thin is not one I support, or feel the need to perpetuate. The reality is that passing up a kind and honorable guy just because he isn't big is ridiculous.
And with that, going for a guy who is tall and buff but not actually a nice person is even more ridiculous. Check out the video below, and be sure to subscribe to Bustle’s You Tube page for more self love inspo!
There’s nothing more frustrating than spending the evening with someone so shallow they’re the human equivalent of a puddle.
It was more that I was taught that a woman (especially a fuller-figured and tall woman) must only date a man who was even more fuller-figured and taller than she was.Traditionally, lots of us are taught this without even realizing it. I'd like to think that I'm the kind of person who values personality over aesthetics.In some ways, it's not much different to the stigma surrounding "checkerboard couples," (Penny Pingleton and Seaweed J. This is the main reason I was taught not to go for for anyone slender. Had Paddy been tall and buff, I probably would've been just as likely to fall for him based on who he is.I remember one time back in high school when I was having supper at a friend’s house.I’d mentioned that I’d seen other plus-sized women happily dating, and I couldn’t figure out why I was having such tough luck finding myself someone.
You know, so he could "slim" her down, and make her seem more "womanly" or "dainty" or whatever. The majority of my family — both of my parents and EVERYONE else — firmly believe(d) that the woman of a heterosexual relationship was meant to be the slimmer one of the party of two. And as a result, I spent most of high school and early college either refusing to date (and passing up perfectly lovely guys because they were thinner or shorter than me).